media consumption | mar 2025

[darkunicorna]

HAPPY MARCH! my energy levels are super low i think bc of accutane lol so everything is a struggle and there is so much going on and also so much work to do but we'll get through... maybe after march 16 i'll feel more normal lol anyway as always, this is a work in progress and will be updated as i watch/read/whatever more things throughout the month!

edit: after march 16 i did not feel normal LOL had my first breast biopsy, hosted friends for NCT 127 concert, saw the thing w john carpenter and bong joonho moderating, could not get myself to write for s*oulbeats for the LIFE of me... oh the epic highs and lows of football life!


tv

• the pitt: season 1, ep 9 still watching this show! still loving it! ep 8 was really heavy and a little hard to watch ngl bc a lot around death. ep 9 was also a big one, and we were left on a rather big cliffhanger. so far i think i like dr. collins and dr. mohan best :) and i also like dr. king! tho i'm so curious where her story is going... is she going to develop a crush on dr. langdon :((((( we'll see soon enough!


• the first frost: c-drama, ep. 17 i didn't realize it until like halfway through ep 1 lol but this is actually a spinoff / companion story to hidden love, and so far i LOOOOOOOVE it way more than hidden love LMAOOOO not that hidden love was Bad... but you only have to scroll down a few posts to see how i felt abt it HAHAHA i think this one has way more tropes that i love (namely, man is down so bad lol and second chance romance af aka my bread and butter) and also the story is focused on wen yifan and sang yan when they are already older, and their high school romance is just shown in little flashback sequences. i'm CRYING the way there are so many bogus ass men who are interested in wen yifan but sang yan is like, the only one who actually understands what she needs AS WELL AS HOW SHE IS AS A PERSON so like sure she'll need help and sure xiang lang can be like "you can rely on me" but sang yan will GET HER to rely on him by creating Situations (like making too much porridge and being like pls help me eat it... or being like "i like the smaller room better so i wanna use the smaller room and you should use the bigger room" and just be there helping her so silently... like googling sleepwalking and COVERING ALL THE CORNERS OF THE WALLS / FURNITURE IN THE APARTMENT SO THAT SHE WON'T HURT HERSELF WHILE SLEEPWALKING. i'm. i'm going to die. he's perfect. i am fully converted to bai jingtingism i'm so sorry to chen zheyuan and ding yuxi (although i still like ding yuxi but bai jingting is like 1000% my type rn SORRY) and at first i was like. it's weird that you all recast sang yan and sang zhi and duan jiaxu. but also BAI JINGTING. so i'm ok with it. lol. i think this drama is more realistic than hidden love in that duan jiaxu was for sure in so much debt but then suddenly was able to provide so much for sang zhi??? but sang yan IS rich and HAS BEEN rich so it makes sense that he can provide for wen yifan lol BUT. i think the side romances are a little underdeveloped... like we're basically just told that zhong siqiao has a crush on xiang lang, but i was never really convinced that she liked him / was heartbroken by his rejection? which also SUCKED by the way he could have still lied abt the bracelet like it was clearly special to her BROOO... also xiang lang in general is such a flat character like he's so useless and meaningless. i did like zhong siqiao and su haoan's budding romance and was excited abt it, but again i feel like it's slightly underdeveloped... i like that zsq continues to support sha and his family BUT i think there could be SLIGHTLY MORE romanticism between them bc rn it just seems like they're becoming rly good friends. ALSO mu chengyun you are ANNOYING.


• when life gives you tangerines: ep 3 really loving this so far! i love how historically relevant it is, even down to little details like outfits and chopsticks (this is an example, i've already forgotten what the rly relevant details were lmao oops). macarthur mention + olympics mention + korean historical uprisings etc it's really cool to weave all of those together w this story they are telling! that being said, i'm really not sure what this story they are telling will be lol bc so far we're already on ep 3 and iu is already married to park bogum and they alr have a kid together... seems the show is from the perspective of aesun's daughter, and seems like park bogum honestly won't be in it much...? iu def moreso bc she plays geummyeong as well. i think it's relevant that the first word we hear our mc (geummyeong, not aesun... who is the mc... hell if i know) actually speak is "eomma," so i think this will be a story centered on generations of women and the hopes and dreams they pass down to each other, but we will see. i saw this thread that i thought was interesting on twitter and will reassess how i feel abt it when i get to that episode! also this tweet... many tweets in fact haha i want to know more!


• adolescence: ep 4 was number one on netflix and i was mildly interested and it was only four episodes, so i gave it a chance since it wouldn't distract me TOO much from what i was SUPPOSED to be doing l o l. each episode is all one take, which is extremely impressive, and the acting is super top notch — in particular jamie (played by owen cooper) and briony (played by erin doherty). the first ep focuses on jamie being arrested and the process of questioning him to find out how guilty he is of the crime he has been accused of. the entire episode is filmed for us to have pity on this young boy who is being treated like a criminal, only for the reveal to happen at the end that he truly undeniably did the crime. FIRST OFF, damn lawyers (or solicitors) in the UK are ASS... or maybe it's the point that he was given a free solicitor and as a result he was ass at his job? lmao. told him to say no comment to anything that was sus and didn't even ask him to find out whether or not he really did it...? i feel like i knew he really did it just because the trailer gave some indications of such.
  ep 2 was fascinating but the weakest imo just in its execution — felt a little bit too much like an adult looking at a school / school kids instead of actually from kids' perspectives, and i think it would have been far more interesting to focus on the kids' perspectives. the beginning has jamie's two friends talking about how they've been questioned... would have been fascinating to actually follow them for the whole ep, or to hear a lot more from them and their perception of jamie / the social situation at school instead of seeing it through the eyes of an adult lol. the scene w adam, the detective's son, explaining to him the emojis rly feels like those news programs that explain texting lingo to parents lmao "lol means laugh out loud" etc etc... treats both the adults and the kids as dumb haha. also jade and her character was interesting, but not enough was done with her to really flesh out the impact of katie's absence. they tried to shove so much characterization for her into like two small scenes, dropping that she has a troubled home and that katie's death is causing her to lash out w anger (friend pointed out they relied too much on the angry Black woman trope and i see it), but like... imo that stuff was not relevant to what they actually want to convey, which is the problem of a growing conservative male population and their impact on the people around them. in that way, i think they chose the wrong characteristics to highlight for jade to make jade's scenes really impactful for the story. ngl i would have taken a full episode on jade as well as katie's family. also, was katie cool? like we hear that from jamie's perspective, he and his friends are losers. is this even true? was katie a threat to them bc she was popular and therefore what she thought of them carried significant weight? also when the detective is like "omg so katie was bullying jamie!" when he found out that she was calling him an incel... i was like is that rly bullying lol. is that bad of me. if it's a fact it's a fact. the adam storyline was also kind of hastily wrapped up lol and i didn't know that the next episode would switch perspectives. i would have liked for each episode to switch perspectives so we could see more sides of the impact of the crime.
  ep 3 is the absolute stand out of the series to me, next to ep 1 (ep 3 is on top tho). unlike the other episodes, this one primarily takes place in one room as psychologist briony ariston, who is one of two psychologists assessing whether or not jamie is mentally sound — basically if he understands what exactly he did and whether or not it was a crime. the way jamie flips back and forth between confident and insidious and anxious and pitiful is absolutely fascinating to watch, especially since both emotions likely do live within him. he mentions thinking himself ugly, and it becomes clear that his actions are primarily focused on validation or a lack thereof — including from his father, who invalidated his masculinity bc jamie is not good at sports. that def might have led to jamie seeking other ways to prove his masculinity, and katie denied him that as well. absolutely insane the little ways he slips up in the interview and the ways he becomes desperate when he realizes briony has come to her decision about his mental soundness. his desperation in asking her whether or not she liked him... truly emphasizes the validation and likability he is constantly seeking. also i am now obsessed w erin doherty she was OUTSTANDING in all the little ways she conveyed how she was really feeling despite her need to remain composed and professional throughout the interview. the way she pivoted her questions based on jamie's behavior — THE WAY WOMEN HAVE TO CONSTANTLY SHAPE AND CONTROL THEIR EMOTIONS BASED ON THE MEN AROUND THEM... and the way jamie deliberately tried to scare her OH YOU EVIL LITTLE SHIT. when she kind of lets the tears flow at the end but still quickly composes herself... the amount of control she has over herself is in stark contrast to the lack of control jamie has over himself. also the contrast between the beginning of their interview, in which their banter is friendly and... dare i say... borderline flirtatious... to the end is DRASTIC. absolutely fantastically constructed episode, in part due to the skill of owen cooper and erin doherty!!
  ep 4... this one focuses on jamie's family, particularly his dad. this shows that jamie came from a loving, relatively normal family, so honestly who tf knows what happened to him (probably the internet). the word "nonce" (misspelled) is written on his dad's van on the morning of his bday, so even though he woke up happy, this completely ruins his day. i didn't realize it in the moment bc i didn't know what that word meant LOL but basically it seems like ppl are blaming him and how he raised jamie (or failed to raise jamie) for what jamie did. i've been reading the ways some ppl have interpreted this episode, and i don't necessarily see it? i do see that his dad has emotional / rage issues, but it might also be in part bc he is dealing with extreme stress. i do absolutely acknowledge that you can still see the ways that the women in the family moderate the emotions in the house, trying to calm him down and trying to find solutions that will satisfy him... but also it's his birthday hahaha i would do that for someone on their bday too! so in that sense i don't necessarily see that these things drove jamie down the path to incelism lol. it does show that his behavior mirrors his father, but his father didn't k!ll anyone lol and also based on the story his mom told in the car about the song "take on me," seems like he was able to take bullying in much better stride than jamie. in that sense... is this episode trying to say that jamie's time on the internet is the true catalyst? there is a long bit about parenting, and making someone evil vs someone who is not evil (lisa!), and acknowledging they could have done more... i'm not a parent so i can't read too deeply into that lol it did not REALLY resonate w me as a result lol BUT are the writers saying the parents should have intervened on his internet time? def should have validated him more... idk! what do i know! i think the themes of this episode kind of got lost on me as a result bc it felt like there were too many things it was trying to say / too many themes it was trying to hit. there is a common theme that jamie chose his father as his appropriate adult instead of his mother... to some extent i think it is because he believes his father will understand better what he did and will validate his feelings that led to the crime, vs he knows his mom will be shocked and disappointed. i think jamie thinks his father would understand his mindset more — but in fact, his father doesn't. that's why i think it's weird that so many ppl are kind of just blaming the dad lol i don't think he's THAT bad? but maybe my standards are fucked. either way i think it would be more interesting to me if the episode focused more on the online spaces jamie is in or something like that... took the story bigger picture. but what do i know! not my tv series hahaha. also just pointing out that the kid who spray painted jamie's dad's van seems to be the same kid who shared katie's topless pics with everyone... seems like there's a lot of stuff that still needs to be unpacked re: the larger systemic implications of jamie's behavior. again, that's just me tho!

webtoons / manga / manhwa / manhua

• tears on a withered flower: korean, ongoing, ch. 46 still reading! so satisfying to see the little ways haesoo's life is changing for the better in that she doesn't feel as bad actually buying things for herself... the fuzzy socks! mincheol wondering why haesoo hasn't contacted him yet MAYBE BC SHE HAS A LIFE NOW THAT SHE'S FREE FROM YOUR FUCKING SHACKLES. YOU WERE JUST THE ROCK SHE WAS TIED TO THAT WAS DRAGGING HER DOWN. i totally totally get haesoo's POV where she's like... i thought this relationship from my youth would be forever and now look at it --> ppl will inevitably change and let you down in relationships so i can't rely on / depend on this with taeha; this will never be the perfect dream i want it to be so i will just enjoy it while it lasts. like. she's only known mincheol and has seen how that has played out, so it makes perfect sense that she expects this w taeha as well, esp since he is younger than her... glad to see that she is less resistant than she was previously, but worried about how this mindset might impact their relationship in the future. we are also seeing more of taeha's down bad-ness... like before, we were seeing his obsession, but it wasn't clear if it was in a pos or neg light. now we are seeing that he is rather pitiable w his horrible family situation, that haesoo provides perhaps the only realm of his life that is full of love and attention and care, and that's why he craves her attention so much. it makes him slightly more puppy dog like hahaha i'm rly looking forward to finding out more of his bg and finding out what draws him to haesoo. much speculation that she must have shown him kindness one time offhandedly and he clung to that bc of his terrible life, and i can def see that. thought the latest chapters were super cute, where haesoo takes the day off and is like "let's do whatever you want!" and they do a bunch of stuff together and at the end taeha is like "what if i have more stuff i want to do.. the list is endless..." and haesoo is like well i guess you will just have to keep finding me for next time again and again AWW. anyway yes. still loving this haha along w the essays ppl are writing in the comments!


• trashy situation: korean, ongoing, ch. 37 still reading! recently found out that ppl are HATING on eungyo in the comments bc they're baffled at how so many ppl are in love w her + think she's a boring / useless character??? ummm. i am guilty of complaining abt the number of ppl in love w her, as seen in my previous entries l o l BUT i don't think it's a reflection on HER i think it's a reflection on the writer / writing??? omg i truly forgot how much other ppl hate women lol and i don't think she's boring per se... i can relate to her being in a slump and just trying to have a fun good time. i think she's a sharp person who was just taken down by her former relationship... who among us hasn't been where she is? maybe the 18-22yos who have been untouched by the troubles of life who are reading this lmaoo. anyway the most recent chapters had a pretty steamy snu snu scene that i was still thinking about and comparing other media to (looking at you flowers are bait hahaha) so! still a pos to me! and also i think the artist draws boobs rly nicely lol not unrealistic, still super attractive. i approve!


• it's just a dream... right?: korean, complete, ch. 77 WAAAAAHHHHH what a lovely story!! love love loved this so much! the art is fabulous — my dear ibeom is so so so cutieful and the anatomy during intimate scenes seems really dynamic and effortless and detailed; like, this is an experienced artist we have on our hands! i'm obsessed w the fact that this artist was just like... how can i put this couple in a situation where i can draw them in historic korean outfits? and they did that and SO MUCH MORE... looooved how there were so many fun and interesting and unique intimate situations these two were put in hahaha my fav was def the 6 jungohs vs 1 ibeom. the miscommunication trope def sucks haha but thankfully the story isn't that long, so the misunderstandings weren't drawn out TOO long. i adored the chapter where ibeom goes running to grandma and has to confess to her and his parents that he is romantically involved w jungoh LOL his parents are so great :')))))) i thought the seeds for the nightmare seedling escaping were planted v well and v subtly; i'm not sure if i would have picked up on it all if i wasn't reading it all straight for 2 days lmao and i like memory-related things so i enjoyed that part too HAHA even tho it's such an overused trope... i still love it :D the author mentioned in a midway author's note that they really wanted to focus on keeping the story balanced, and i think it rly is an excellent balance betw plot and romance. all the dreams were really interesting, and i didn't feel like anything dragged out too long :) i def want to check out this artist's other works!


• netkama punch!!: korean, complete, ch. 80 i enjoyed this! i love dynamics w two ppl in a relationship where they don't naturally like each other... where it's a bit of a struggle but it's worth it in the end... these two are so interesting bc they were drawn to each other bc of their fears of abandonment, in a way? like heejae was so afraid of being left after his parents left him, so when seyeong leaves him he's like NO WAY IN HELL AM I ACTUALLY ALLOWING THIS. and for seyeong... i actually don't remember how he fears abandonment lol i think it's related to his parents too but... my brain is a sieve these days and i alr forgot lol i think he's just afraid of ppl leaving him in the end after he finally opens up, so he resists heejae for so long :( i empathize so much w both of thei fears! anyway i ate this UP left no crumbs bc i was so obsessed w the concept and constantly wondering what each of them were actually thinking + where their relationship would go haha i was so happy by the end, tho i wish we could have had seen seyeong actually streaming tgt w heejae. i am Me so obvi looooved the parts where seyeong would accidentally speak while heejae was streaming or something and ppl would go INSANE in the comments hahah and idk... i liked heejae being possessive... but ppl in the comments kept being like "this man is mentally unwell" lmao "this relationship is toxic" OKAY???? IT'S FICTION??? actually the dynamic reminded me A BIT of a first frost, except there was def more hatred and strife LOL and obvi these two are men (and in that sense i think more strife is acceptable + i prefer the hetero one to be w less strife lol). also i keep writing heejay lmfao. ppl in the comments kept mentioning other manhwa w similar concepts, so i'm gonna check those out too :)


• the guild member next door: korean, ongoing, ch. 69? (s2 e19) i read this one bc ppl mentioned it in the comments saying it was similar to netkama punch!! i can see the similarities... and again in general i like the concept! i liked how in this manhwa, there was more of an emphasis on the game, but perhaps there was TOO much of an emphasis? LOLLL it just moved SOOOOO slowly like we don't rly get irl interactions until s2 and s1 is all focused on the game and game dynamics. which is fine! i enjoyed it! but it didn't keep me wanting to know what would happen next. i did really like the idea of yeowoon being so nice that ppl constantly have crushes on him, and i rly wanted to hear more about that backstory and how it has impacted yeowoon, except... it hardly seems to impact him at all LMAO he's still oblivious af which is cute but i would love if that were more of a central part of the story. also the misunderstandings are TOO much imo like at this point jigu still thinking yeowoon is a pervert w weird sex kinks? and yeowoon still thinking jigu likes otome games? (but also the bit of yeowoon being rly bad at that otome game was TOO good haha would have loved more of that) i just think these misunderstandings went on a tad too long for my liking. overall enjoyable for what it was, but i don't think i will be continuing / keeping up!


• kiraide isasete: japanese, ongoing, vol. 7 ch. 2 i was originally attracted to this one bc some people have been using a pic of baby minato as a reaction image in the comments of the various bls i've been reading, and i thought the kid looked sooooo cuuuuuute. i ended up starting it this past weekend (today being 3/17 lol) bc i wanted something to read and I THOUGHT THIS WAS COMPLETE... it is NOT....... anyway i obvi don't love the premise but i love kid tropes so i thought i would give it a try... i feel like once you get over the hump of the whole r*ape concept (once murasame ikuya is DEALT WITH) then it's a super sweet slice of life story abt this little family over the course of time, and we see shizuku go from a baby to a preteen w her first crush and we see their family grow with more and more kids and it's SO CUTE AND SO SWEET AND AAAAAAAHHHHHH the art is also v nice (hazuki is HOT) tho i feel like naoto doesn't have a consistent look weirdly enough? also none of the kids rly resemble him except minato w his hair color but that's IT LOLLL poor naoto
  
• semantic error: korean, complete, currently on ch. 20-something lol i don't have my ipad w me was really enjoying this! the art is so pretty omg jaeyoung is a hottie. also sangwoo is autistic af PLEASEEEE. the concept is so up my alley! there were just a bunch of chapters missing on the site i was reading on so i was gonna pay to read it on manta but then i didn't end up doing it bc i knew i couldn't read it right away since i had to WRITE (and then i didn't even end up writing rip)


• love for sale: korean, complete, currently on ch. 20-something lol once again i don't have my ipad on me i thought this was cute! the art is really gorgeous and this person clearly knows human anatomy. i'm not SUCKED IN but i am curious to know more about si-eon and his motivations / past re: taking care of others. also i really love namwoo's family dynamic... not that it's a good dynamic LMAOO but that i think it has a lot of potential to be interesting / to hit on tropes i like aka self-sacrifical shit and guilt and feelings of unworthiness hoho. i'm just not sure where the plot is going or whether or not it will go in a direction i like, bc right now it seems like these two are just f*cking lol like will feelings develop... rn i'm so afraid of just reading sm*t (i found out ppl call it snu snu??) with no feelings haha i think i was burned by whatever i was reading last month and dropped lol. we'll see if i continue!


• relationship principle: korean, ongoing, ch. 13 really cute! i like a down bad obsessive boy lmfao OBVIOUSLY IN FICTION NOT IN REAL LIFE if this happened irl i would get a restraining order asap BUT in fiction when you know it's w good intentions it's cute and nice. a lot of people hating on mc nayoon for refusing to date seolwoo even tho she likes him... first, i think she doesn't necessarily like him rn but thinks he's attractive and feels obligated / bad for him, less so that she actually likes him. second, ppl NEED to learn to survive on their own i'm not even kidding lol i feel like so many of my friends are truly just jumping straight into relationships right away which is so baffling to me lol but like. you actually do not learn so many things abt yourself / how to take care of yourself if you do that. so imo she makes sense! the art is nice and everyone is pretty, tho sometimes seolwoo looks a little inconsistent lol. also the prologue started off w a s*x scene and it was like. the most boring s*x scene i've ever seen lol so no high hopes there. but cute when i have time and i'm bored!


• flowers as bait: korean, ongoing, ch. 20 um. I LOVED THIS SO FREAKING MUCH LOL. i did NOT expect to, esp after reading the synopsis many times and being like "ok this is def not for me" lol but someone mentioned this in the comments for tears of a withered flower (and now WHY are ppl hating on haesoo I JUST. i have holed myself in a corner of the internet that does not hate on FLs for so long that i forgot ppl were like this lol aka internally misogynist HAHA) and i was like um ok i'll just read it and check it out (it's only a few chapters rn and i'm BORED / trying to avoid WRITING / life responsibilities so!). anyway. i freaking loved it lmao after i caught up on the manhwa i immediately went to the internet novel and got to ch. 211 before i stopped my obsessive binge behavior haha. the art is so niiiiice (tho in the later chapters chaewoo is looking a little too dorito for me) and i love the paneling... like the opening truly seems os scary and like a horror manhwa and the panels are drawn so creatively to convey those feelings... also when lee yeon thinks of certain trees to calm down haha. rly loved the way the artist conveyed certain things from the novel, and some ppl are saying this is even better than the novel and so far i am inclined to agree. the novel gets a little messy lmfaooo i am at the part where they've broken up and parted ways but he finds out she's pregnant ripppp once again tho i am so here for the obsessive man in hetero ships and this man is extremely obsessive omg. anyway lee yeon is the flower that is the bait btw. bait for chaewoo! so his brother can control him!!! WHAT is going on w his mother figure tho like did lee yeon turn her in bc she asked her to? or not? why did lee yeon not accept the reward money LMFAO like you already did the bad thing so now... the bad thing is still done and you don't even get anything out of it except a lifetime of guilt LOL. but anyway! the art is nice. i don't think the s*x scenes in the novel really make me feel anything tho haha.

movies

just canceled amc alist so hoping to be able to go to more independent theatres in the coming months! as always, i usually log my thoughts on letterboxd :)


books

i usually log my books on literal! currently reading:

• the graham effect by elle kennedy i used to LOOOOVE elle kennedy when i was in my early 20s. i remember from her first hockey romance series, i loved the deal and the score the best :') i downloaded hoopla bc lys told me hoopla would have my beautiful man (and they did!), and i saw they were advertising a new elle kennedy book on the homepage. when i saw she had created a whole new series about a next generation of briar students, and when i saw one of them was about garrett and hannah's CHILD???? i knew i had to read it immediately!!! i loved garrett and hannah and truly reread that book SOOOO many times. anyway. i will say that i have genuinely laughed a couple of times reading this book, but so far i'm like. what chemistry is there between gigi and ryder LOL like why tf do they like each other idgi. ryder barely says anything. he just thinks gigi is physically attractive. i was just thinking of like, what gigi would say to defend ryder to her dad and convince him that ryder's actually a good guy, and i came up w nothing LOL like there's nothing there. also the sex scenes are Bad. i think i need to reread the deal to see if it's just this book that elle kennedy is off her game, or if she's always been off her game and i'm only realizing it now bc i'm older and less stupid LOL. I WILL SAY. i think elle kennedy has Heard the Criticisms bc there is def more hockey talk in this book than in previous books — like we get actual lengthy breakdowns of games! and also i rly like that gigi is a hockey player :))))) BUT. even then i feel like ryder is lowkey sexist LOL. but i'm already halfway through so might as well go the full monty!


• shoot your shot by lexi lafleur brown ok well i mostly started this bc i was pretty interested in the description + i heard ppl saying it was Bad but then ppl criticized the ppl saying it was Bad by wondering if we were all just being misogynist. which, valid. i think that assessment is accurate so far bc the book is not bad! it is not the best hockey romance i have ever read but it is FAR from the worst, and i think it actually is quite refreshing to read stories in this genre / subtype that have multiple ppl of color LMAO and also multiple queer people. like thank god now this seems like a real world i would live in HAHA. tbd on how my feelings will change over time; as of now i am ~25% of the way through the book!


• scum villain self-saving system vol. 1, 2, and half of 3 by mxtx in case it wasn't obvious from my webtoon reads LOL i was rly craving insanely obsessive romance haha. binghe is more Babygirl than i remembered, specifically toward sqq; obviously i knew he was down bad, but i had forgotten how sparkly crying whiny baby he was abt it LOL thought all the art was just exaggerating for jokes... NOPE. also reading the official translation was def a different experience! i was analyzing the fuck out of the beginning to see how shen yuan dies... NOTHING. and i was able to pick up on more details this time around i think! idk why i didn't put together that shen yuan is constantly sacrificing himself for binghe LMAO he's so competent UNTIL he sees binghe and then it's like well! time to die! anyway i still love these characters so so dearly lol i stopped bc i was supposed to be writing / also my attention span is total shit lol but at least i got to all the good shit HAHAHA abyss... check! huanhua basement/dungeon... check! binghe sleeping w sqq's dead corpse... check! even got to the holy mausoleum, which i had def forgotten about LOLL. rn i'm just missing a lot of shen qingqiu's back story, which was never really why i was there anyway. the reason me being there being. LUO BINGHE MY PRINCESS BABY! love the scenes when sqq comes back and shows up in binghe's dream realm and binhe is just so devastated... WAAAH. also hey... i only just realized that all the sect leaders at cang qiong mountain have qing in their names LOL. OH ALSO i did spot some typos lol hehehe seven seas!!!!!!!!!!!!


• doppleganger by naomi klein FASCINATING read rn. a lot about the digital self being a doppleganger and how historically dopplegangers are harbingers... and how sometimes the doppleganger can be all the things we aren't able to show / aren't socially acceptable. a lot of things threaded through about COVID as well, and it's rather refreshing tho also tiring to read a book that doesn't pretend COVID didn't exist lol — tiring bc it means we have to acknowledge that the government failed to protect us from a mass disabling event and we could do little to nothing about it... also brought up the idea of brands / personal brands being dopplegangers that are Bad (omg am i too stupid to discuss this book properly lol). also obvi brings up things about naomi wolff, her doppleganger, and i was rly shocked to hear about vaccine shedding and how ppl think that's a real thing? and def felt like wolff's fearmongering around vaccines threatening our private data / information was like one degree away from me talking abt like, apple or amazon. but one is backed by science and one is not regulated by the government at all so... anyway! still slowly listening to this on audiobook and it will likely take me a LONG time to finish, but i started bc i wanted to be educated and i wanted something to listen to, since i was already reading things like scum villain w my eyes lol wtf else would i do on my commute or while washing dishes??